Oh dear, it’s time for a new post. I have been focussing on short, short stories on the virtues and vices, sort of by accident, perhaps because I have been taking a course on the Indwelling of the Holy Spirit, so I guess virtues, gifts, and Beatitudes are on my mind. And Advent. Hence a sober story about pride, humility, and charity.
Brother Lawrence entered the monastery full of zeal. He was the first one of the monks to enter the chapel for Prime, which was remarkable since this Office was in the middle of the night. He quickly learned how to read in Latin and sing the psalms with the other monks. None of the new postulants could compete with him in his understanding of St. Benedict’s Rule. He kept the silence admirably, knew all the proper monastic responses to the words of the prior, and bowed just so during the Creed and the Gloria. His habit was immaculate, and he did his work with diligence and humility. Or at least so it appeared.
Brother Lawrence lacked charity. He was proud of his perfection, and mentally found fault with all the other less-than-perfect monks. Therefore he also lacked humility but had no lack of pride.
The prior knew all these things, as did all the other brothers and priests. A white-washed sepulcher never gleamed as brightly, while the inside was full of corruption. What to do? thought the prior. Then it came to him. Have Brother Lawrence pray the litany of humility before the community after Mass, before meals in the refectory, and at Compline. The prior knew God would answer the prayer in just the right way.
“Brother Lawrence, I give this prayer for you to recite before the community. I am sure it will do you all some good.”
“Yes, Father. May I depart, Father?"” Brother Lawrence accepted the parchment, bowed to the prior after receiving permission, and left sedately.
That evening after Compline, the prior said to the gathered community, “Brother Lawrence has a prayer I have asked him to read now. He will also do so after Mass, before meals in the refectory, for the rest of Advent and into Lent. I am sure it will do us all good.” He smiled.
When Brother Lawrence began to read, several of the older monks also smiled. They knew this prayer quite well.
“The Litany of Humility,” said Brother Lawrence, and began.
O Jesus, meek and humble of heart, Hear me. From the desire of being esteemed, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the desire of being loved, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the desire of being extolled, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the desire of being honored, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the desire of being praised, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the desire of being preferred to others, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the desire of being consulted, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the desire of being approved, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of being humiliated, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of being despised, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of suffering rebukes, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of being calumniated, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of being forgotten, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of being ridiculed, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of being wronged, Deliver me, O Jesus. From the fear of being suspected, Deliver me, O Jesus. That others may be loved more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be esteemed more than I, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That, in the opinion of the world, others may increase and I may decrease, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be chosen and I set aside, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be praised and I go unnoticed, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may be preferred to me in everything, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should, Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it. Charity Charity is patient, is kind; charity does not envy, is not pretentious, is not puffed up, is not ambitious, is not self-seeking, is not provoked; thinks no evil, does not rejoice over wickedness, but rejoices with the truth, bears with all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (1 Cor. 13:4-7). To have Charity is to love God above all things for Himself and be ready to renounce all created things rather than offend Him by serious sin. ( Matt. 22:36-40)
So it was that small trials began for Brother Lawrence. He fell and broke both legs. He was bed bound for two months because he could not manage the two casts with crutches. The other brothers had to help him into and out of the wheel chair, give him bed baths, dress him and carry him down the stairs to Mass where another wheel chair awaited. They teased him good-naturedly, but every word rankled him. He hated being helpless. But at least it reduced the number of times he had to pray the prayer to Mass and meals. For the two months he was helpless, he noticed how some monks cared for him with a particular gentleness and, well, he had to admit, charity. Next, all of the other postulants advanced to novice except him. "Fr. Prior, I thought my behavior was exemplary. Why have I been left a postulant?" "My son, there is no other reason to live this life but love of God. You have no love. Yet I have hope for you." Brother Lawrence had been a historian in his prior life, studying Medieval History, with a concentation on monastic life. Perhaps that was why he felt he knew every thing. But his pride was about to suffer a severe blow. Brother Lawrence's last manuscript had been submitted before he entered the order. The reviews came back and they were excoriating. He wanted to dash off a heated letter to the editor, but the prior would not permit it. So he was left to stew in his own juices. Then he heard by way of an academic friend that his old rival had received a MacArthur Fellowship. He spent hours on his knees over that one, praying the Litany. He had begun to see a pattern. With each further humiliation he responded with increasing acceptance and less kicking against the goads. He was sent clean out the the chicken coops and stables as his regular job until he became cheerful. He served in the scullery washing dishes. Then he was sent to the infirmary to care for sick monks, with all that entailed. The rough edges of community life had finally rubbed him smooth and the prayer had brought him peace. If he had no concern for what people thought, he had no reputation to protect. And the infirmary finally taught him charity, that gift that opens the door to all gifts. When his prior was dying, he called Father Lawrence, now a professed priest, to his bedside. The prior took his hands and said, "I was right to have hope. It does not disappoint, does it, Father?" "No, Fr. Prior. If I may quote?" "Yes, of course." "From a set of verses I held on to during my trials, Romans Chapter 5: ...We boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us." " Indeed. Will you hear my confession, Father?" said the prior, and smiled.
Lovely story. Thank you